Monday, July 14, 2008

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Top 5 Day? I think so...



The weekend starts tonight at 10PM. Board games, FIFA, Wii, and fellowship at my house. We are doing this in order to have a good time without going out and getting too drunk before tomorrow. Of course, it is highly unlikely that we stay in and don't go on an Andrew Jackson hunt. So tonight bring beer, clothes for tomorrow, beer for tomorrow, any board games you want to play, and a good attitude.

Tomorrow I am waking up at 9:30 to take care of my business so that I can watch one episode of Law and Order at 10AM before I go to the beach. I am going to the beach from 11-6, and I am plan on drinking a little bit. If you plan on getting too wasted to make it back to my house before the fireworks, then bring one of my shitty beach chairs, not a good one. Hamburgers, ribs, and some type of side will be served at 6PM. After food, drink, showers, and more fellowship, it's back down to the beach for the fireworks. From there it's Tybee bar time: good luck being able to get inside anywhere, or getting a drink for that matter. Don't slam my door downstairs, pee outside or in the toilet, and don't drive.

Quick recap: Drink tomorrow from 10-6. Then food at 6 at my house. All are welcome. Then fireworks and bars. Happy Fourth of July.

"GOD BLESS AMERICA!LAND THAT I LOVE"- Charles Francis Seyden IV. c/o 62'

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

The Top Five: Long Weekend Edition

With the holiday weekend coming up, as well as my needing to put together a CD tonight for the drive home tomorrow, I've been thinking a lot about the concept of the “song of the summer.” Every summer seems to have one song in particular that you'll always find playing on at least two radio stations at one time. Last summer, I guess it was “Umbrella” (but correct me if I'm wrong). And since I haven't listened to the radio at all this month, and thus have absolutely no idea what song is driving people insane right now, I thought this installment of The Top Five should include some of my own songs of the summer so far. (You have to click the link for the full song on some of these, unfortunately)

1. Weezer – The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations On a Quaker Hymn)

It's no secret that Weezer hasn't done anything worthwhile since 1996, but this song is so fucking terrible it's not even funny. No, seriously. It's the worst shit I've ever heard in my life. So bad I have to fill up this little blurb with profanity. So bad that it borders on absolute brilliance. Honestly, listen to this song and try to imagine writing something worse. You can't. I've already tried. It is totally perfect in its awfulness. It is, quite literally, the “Bohemian Rhapsody” of bad alt-rock. I don't know if it's a joke or not, and I don't really care, because this is the most amazing song I've heard in a long, long time.

Here's a loose outline of this monumental achievement in American music: Canned applause –> Somber piano –> Police sirens –> Rap rock –> Some vintage Weezer whining –> Enter choir: “After the havoc that I'm gonna wreak, no more words will critics have to speak” –> classic rock falsetto action –> Weezer parodies itself –> Spoken word section: “Act II, I hit the big time, and bodies be all up on my behind... If you don't like it, you can shove it. But you don't like it. You love it” –> Brian Wilson three-part harmony –> more Weezer-by-numbers –> Fin.

The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations On A Shaker Hymn) – Weezer

2. The Hold Steady – Constructive Summer

I told you The Hold Steady would be on here every time, and it does seem a little too easy to throw this song on the list, seeing as it sounds like the band sat down one day and decided to write something people would blare in their cars all summer long, but hey, it's executed perfectly. And you've got to admit, any song that invites you to scream “GET HAMMERED!” at the top of your lungs is a very rocking song indeed.

Constructive Summer - The Hold Steady

3. Bruce Springsteen – Rosalita (Come Out Tonight)

If there's any artist I always associate with the summer, it's Bruce Springsteen, and there's not a better song to listen to loud with the windows down on the way to the beach than this one (before anyone argues that point, as Eric Cartman once said: “Fuck you, Jimmy Buffett! You fucking suck!) I also can't help but respect any track that goes on for seven minutes without venturing anywhere near heady territory.

Rosalita (Come Out Tonight) - Bruce Springsteen

4. Camera Obscura – Lloyd, I'm Ready To Be Heartbroken

I might get made fun of for this one, but I can take it. Song's catchy as all hell. You know you can't resist it.

Lloyd, Im Ready To Be Heartbroken - Camera Obscura

5. My Morning Jacket – Lay Low

I hadn't listened to this band in a pretty long time, but then I heard their new record, Evil Urges. It was so bad I had to immediately go back and listen to their other albums just to make sure it was the same group. And unfortunately, everything on Evil Urges is just plain crappy, not the awesome degree of atrociousness that is Weezer's “Greatest Man.” So I couldn't use any of those songs for this list, but I did remember how much I liked this song a couple years ago.

Lay Low - My Morning Jacket

Feel free to post your own songs of the summer. Otherwise, see you at Game Night.